one, two, three, four...
The rubber soles of my shoes hit the wet pavement as I throw myself rhythmically against the quiet rain and the frigid cold that is only a few degrees away from freezing.
I can feel my muscles catching fire, my blood pulsing hot through my icy skin. I can feel my heart pounding its way from my stomach to my head. I can feel the mist of water on my face, and I'm no longer sure whether it's the rain or sweat or tears.
It doesn't matter anyways. Not at this time of night.
I pick up my pace, not knowing where I'm going and trusting my body to mechanically find it's way through the foggy darkness, where the headlights of passing cars are the only source of light. I wonder vaguely if the people in those cars think I'm insane.
They probably do.
They're not wrong.
I don't notice the sharp pain in my side anymore, or the heaving of my lungs as they try to absorb the deathly cold air seeping into my veins, intoxicating me slowly. I don't notice that my muscles aren't burning anymore, a sensation slowly being replaced by a numbness creeping up my body.
I no longer feel you in my consciousness. I no longer feel me in my consciousness.
But somehow through my numbness, I can feel the night enveloping me, embracing me, running its cold, steely fingers down my spine. I can feel myself moving further and further away from a fluorescently lit concrete prison, away from the bright glow of a staticky screen in a dark, stuffy room, away from a pile of humans who have been pulped and then molded into cheery androids. Away from a lifeless life.
Away from you. Away from me.
Some people run to exercise.
Some people run for fun.
Some people run to clear out their minds, to release whatever bottled weight is preventing them from facing the adversity they have in front of them.
But not me. At least not this time.
I'm running to escape.